So, a few years later now, and I have undergone a transformation. I am no longer afraid of fighting; I now see violence not as something bad in and of itself, but a means to an end... I also have been labeled as having an anger problem and have been forced to see the school counselor a few times. (Story for another time.)
I also get the joy of going to a new school. Being "the new kid" is never fun. Even once you grow up, you can still be "the new kid." You just got hired for a job, "new kid." It is much the same. You have that feeling of being an outsider, and people are going to have to test the waters with you to find out if they like you or not. They might do this by striking up a conversation, or asking around about you.
Bullies do this by fighting.
Within one month of going to that school, I had not made more than a few casual acquaintances. Then, one day, everyone was scrambling to be my new bestest buddy ever. Why? Because I beat up the school bully.
Roland and I were the biggest and strongest boys in our class, thus, we were destined to clash at least a couple of times. One time, he had me down by my throat and was trying to strangle me (being but a kid, he lacked the digit strength to do a manual choke, thank God). I replied by trusting my knuckle into his eye. The fight ended just about then, when the woman on "yard duty" saw us. (Their response time at this new school was much better.)
I got my recesses revoked for two weeks. He suddenly became "ill" and stayed home, making a miraculous recovery on our field trip day only to lapse back into sickness for the rest of his two weeks.
My first day out of detention, I felt like a god. Kids who had never even glanced at me before were holding doors open for me. Kids who used to be mean were being downright pleasant to me. It took me a little while to figure out why.
And there it is. Violence not only got Roland to leave me alone, it also got me respect (which was nice), adoration (which was annoying), and a modicum of fear (which was heavenly). By fighting one fight, I had almost guaranteed that I would have to fight no more. My time at that school was actually fairly pleasant. I got along very well with all of my teachers, I made friends, I had no more big fights... and I still believe that it all came down to Violence.
Then we moved again.